Survey says what??

Yesterday when I was going through Rogit's school papers I found a survey with a little note attached asking me to fill it out and return it. First time that has ever happened but okay, sure.

So I sat down last night to read this survey. It says it's for the improvements of our buildings and grounds. Okay, that's probably worth my time. Let's see what some of the questions are. (Not edited, minus the commentary of course, so that you can see it in it's original glory.)

1. Yes/No (apparently when you work with children you think every note you send home has to be in "check yes or no" format) the maintenance person should perform monthly checks and repairs on all playground equipment to ensure student safety. (uhhhh is this not already being done?? I'm hoping at this point that the questions get better from here)
2. Yes/No all sidewalks should be kept clear of ice and snow during School operating hours to ensure the safety of staff, students, and visitors. (This is the school who started locking the door we could park closest to when dropping off our kids. Now we have a good 50yds of sidewalk between us and the front door. Perhaps we should just strap on the ice skates this year.)
3. Yes/No should the outside gates on the south side of the elementary playground is locked to prevent students from leaving the playground undetected. (Yes you read that right! Our teachers on duty have an interesting habit of watching the kids from INSIDE the front door, especially if the wind might blow their hair or make their nose cold. So yes, a child sneaking away undetected is a very good possibility.)
4. Yes/No level sidewalk on south side of elementary so that rain and ice puddles do not accumulate for the safety of students and visitors. (The door we are required to pick our children up at has a regular lake in front of it when the slightest amount of water falls from the sky. Again, we may need ice skates when winter hits.)

At this point I'm speechless. Is my child's school really having to ASK me if these things need to be done?? It gets better. Read on.


Please rate the following items in the order of importance to you. L for least, M for medium, and H for high. (How exactly do you rate something in order but rate each one individually?)

Secure swing set into the ground at elementary (WHAT?? This swingset has been there for 10 years, has probably 10 swings and tire swings, and you know how an elementary kid can rock a swing. Seriously?? You have to ask if it should be secured into the ground?)

Replace missing boards on treehouse and remove all exposed nails at elementary (Wow. That is all.)

Repair locks and stall doors in bathrooms (These kids have enough trouble getting used to going to the bathroom alone, but maybe having that added threat of someone walking in on them at any time makes them go faster or something.)

Tighten loose baseboards in gym (I dunno, is it on the visitors side? Jeez.)

Fill in playground area with sand (Nah, they're tough. They'll probably only land on their heads or something when they fall off the monkey bars. Glass shards would probably be cheaper anyway.)

Repair broken water fountains (Who needs water? Certainly not children hard at play)

Repair gym bathrooms at high school (Those kids are old enough to pee outside behind a tree)

Put automatic deodorizers in bathrooms (Oh definitely! This obviously outranks everything on this list as priority number one! : .....)

Repair outside basketball goal at high school (Can't have them playing inside on that brand new gym floor the town paid for 10yrs ago only to have them use the elementary's gym)

Repair band room at high school (Considering part of that band room has the potential to allow something, or someone, to fall a good 10 feet if the floor collapses, I think we might put this on the list of definite maybes)


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I'm not feeling so confident in the people who are in charge of my kid from 8-3 five days a week right now.